We asked Young, black and married couples to share their advice on how to maintain a healthy marriage. Here's what they had to say:
1.) "You can either be right or stay married. I am usually kidding with the fellas when I say that but it is actually true and goes for both men and women. In relationships, there are often times when no one is exactly right or wrong, but if you completely stand in "your rightness" all the time and do not bend, then expect to be right by yourself! One word that will help sustain a union: Compromise."
~ Mr. Hawkins
2.) "As you get to know your spouse, you will each learn exactly how to disarm each other during a disagreement. Do not hesitate to use this technique! Refuse to be stubborn and selfish and instead, disarm your spouse. It will save y'all from much unnecessary pain and disconnect. Just know there is no winning an argument; you two are one flesh so when one loses, you both lose. Always say "I love you" and never go to bed angry."
~ The Youngblood's
3.) "1. Guard your tongue...words do hurt...2. Stay respectful in your actions. 3. Put your spouse needs and wants before your own. 4. Never go days without speaking. 5. Pray EVERY NIGHT together and for each other. 6. Keep your sex life spiced up and active. 7. Don't bring anyone in your sex life. 8. know your spouse expectation of you before you say I DO. 9. Keep God the center of your marriage not your friends, parents etc. 10. What happens in your house stays there as much as possible."
~ Mr. Tuck
4.) "Have that 'one' thing that belongs to both of you. Like my husband and I have a phrase if we are in a crowded room and hear it we'd know instantly who said it."
~ Mrs. Shaw
5.) "Keep dating and more importantly keep learning about your mate. You got a lifetime together take time and grow."
~ Mr. Harrington Jr.
6.) "Ask God to MAKE you into a Husband/Wife before the other arrives. Begin to allow yourself to be conformed to the standards by which God laid out for a Husband/Wife as you patiently await the arrival of the your "spouse". Remember, Adam spent time with God, learning to enjoy his relationship with God, before Eve ever showed up."
~ Bro. Stokes
7.) "Never let anyone be able to tell your spouse something about you that they don't already know!!! Even if it was something in the past, they deserve to know. Good or bad. That way nobody can ever blackmail you or feel like they have an effect on your marriage"
~ Mrs. Penaye
8.) "What I myself had to realize.... FORGIVENESS & PATIENCE.. We fail God EVERYDAY but despite our flaws and mistakes he still loves us! Never lose faith.. never give up.. pray && be patient.. things never happen on our time.. & always be the best you!"
~ Mrs. Davis
9.) "Remember that your mate is an individual with their own needs, wants, and desires. Understand that everyday they are with you is because they are CHOOSING to be. Alter your perspective from obligation to appreciation."
~ Mrs. Elliott
10.) "Always show your significant other that you love and appreciate them to the upmost . Always pay attention to them, pray for them, don't take them for granted And most of all love your husband/wife like there's no tomorrow!"
~ Mrs. Burgess-Montgomery
By Richard Lawrence